FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS
ABBREVIATED RULES OF ENGAGEMENT:
- New clients are to complete an application for an appointment prior to discussing a possible session.
- After confirming a time and date for our session, there will be a non-refundable deposit fee paid in advance (see Tribute, Rental Fee, and Deposit section below) and then we can start planning and discussing details.
- Confirmation of our engagement is required two (2) days prior to session via email. Please always reply to the last email exchanged between us and try to never create or start a new thread!
- All clients will shower on site prior to session.
- Always be sure to do an enema prior to session if we are to engage in anal play (please see Hygiene section for directions).
TRIBUTE & DEPOSIT:
I say "no" to others when I say "yes" to you. A non-refundable deposit of $60 per hour is required to reserve an appointment. If you need to postpone or reschedule you will need to pay an additional deposit for the new date even with generous notice. I am booked up in advance often and I will reiterate this fact: I say "no" to others when I say "yes" to you.
This fee is separate from my tribute and covers incall fees or travel expenses. For longer sessions or special engagements, deposit terms will be negotiated on a case by case basis. There is no discount really for seeing me longer as the experience doesn't cheapen the more time we spend together.
Never, under any circumstances, send me a deposit before we confirm our meeting; only send it after I clearly ask for your deposit.
Full tribute is expected at beginning of session to be left where I can see it first thing — I should never have to inquire about this exchange. My tribute amounts are clearly listed on my Amour and Kinky Amour pages. Please enquire directly about longer engagements and travel adventures. If you are an established client then you have the option of using an ePayment method; full tribute is expected at least an hour or more prior to our scheduled engagement and a $50 fee will be added. Please text me after this has been sent so that I can confirm receipt.
All money is good money but larger bills are preferred and I will judge you harshly if I receive a plethora of 20s (bad boy!). If you feel you must put my tribute in an envelope, do not lick the envelope or write on the envelope! I will reuse it as I send mail frequently.
I screen very thoroughly. Security and privacy are important for us to establish a safe, open, and honest relationship. It is necessary for my security to verify everyone with whom I may meet. My screening process is discreet and your privacy is very important to me. Any information given to me will be treated with the utmost confidentiality.
I require a minimum of two (2) provider references in the form of their name and email addresses from currently active providers. If you are new and have never seen a provider or have been absent from the hobby for a few years, please read on...
It is appreciated if you provide a link to their website. But, if you only provide me with a link to their website, this will NOT do — I should never have to lift a pretty little finger to find their contact information. I find it insulting when clients only provide a website.
I do not speak to clients via the phone, text, or video chat until they have been screened, a session is booked, and a deposit has been received. This request to engage in any other manner besides electronic communication prior to our meeting may incur an additional deposit fee.
IF YOU HAVE NEVER SEEN A PROVIDER BEFORE:
If you have no references then, where you would enter provider references on my contact form, please provide me with the following: a link to your public LinkedIn profile and/or a link to a professional business website where your name and contact information are shown. If you do not have either, please write me a nice, courteous message explaining that you do not have either but offer other ways that you can prove your identity and make me feel secure that you’re not a jerk, pig, or serial killer.
Once your contact form is received and if it looks like you are an intelligent and thoughtful human being, I will write back and request that one of or all of the following also be provided to me: a photograph of your driver's license with personal information covered or blurred out (such as your home address), a work ID with your picture, a photo of your business card, and/or an email sent to me (to a non-risqué email address) from your business email.
who i do not want to see:
I am not interested in men who lie about their impotency issues or emotional withholders and do not express pleasure. I enjoy men who express their pleasure as it increases mine.
If you have impotency issues please tell me prior to sessionI have ways to circumvent this normal situation but I need to know prior to session. If you do not feel comfortable telling me this before session, then please find another provider.
Communication is the foundation of our relationship so please help to ensure that it is a strong one!
HOURS & LONGER ARRANGEMENTS:
- I do not work Mondays, Thursdays, or Saturdays (unless I am touring)
- I typically work 8:30am until 10pm and reserve times beginning before 8:30am or ending rather late for those lasting 120 minutes or longer (unless I am touring)
- I do not offer same and next-day appointments
- Meetings of four (4) or more hours are to include a meal and/or outdoor activity
When I am booked or busy this does not mean that I am flat on my back 24/7. I am a low-volume provider who takes days off, does self care, has an exciting civilian life. My lifestyle ensures that I am consistently a high-quality experience. It is not uncommon for me to be booked out for a few weeks at a time. Patience is my favorite quality in a client!
I have my own private and exclusive incall located in the quaint Lake Merritt neighborhood of Oakland near the 880 and 580 highways. It is a short Uber or Lyft ride from BART or a 20 minute walk from Lake Merritt Station. This location is discreet, private, and clean. As this space is not shared with any other providers, nor a primary residence of any sort, we will be the only ones in the space at all times. Parking is easy and safe except for on Thursdays and Fridays when street cleaning occurs between 12:30 PM and 3:30 PM. If your session falls during that time frame then please allow extra travel time as you may have to hunt for a space.
The facilities include a shower with soft towels, mouthwash provided, and unscented toiletries. The primary space is equipped with a customized bondage bed, x-cross, spanking horse/bench, ceiling mirrors, Venus 2000, feminization wardrobe, and all sorts of other fun items!
I offer three (3) hour or longer outcall sessions in the Bay Area. My flat rate deposit for these sessions is $200 to cover my time and travel fees (within a 10 mile radius of Oakland). If the session is four (4) hours or longer then I may require a larger deposit which will be determined based on the nature of our arrangement.
TOURING OUTSIDE THE BAY AREA:
I do not grandfather rates for established clients when touring as my time is limited and traveling is expensive.
I will always require a deposit for incall and outcall sessions while visiting in your city. Luckily, unlike many providers when they tour, my tribute amount will remain the same. Just like when I'm home, I'll require a $60 deposit per hour booked, which is separate from my tribute for incall sessions. When touring NYC, I require that sessions be for 90 (ninety) minutes or longer.
I require a three (3) hour minimum session to be booked for outcalls while touring. My deposit for these sessions is $200 to cover my time and travel fees. My time is extra valuable when I travel. If the session is four (4) hours or longer then I may require a larger deposit which will be determined based on the nature of our arrangement.
HYGIENE IS THE KEY TO MY HEART:
It is easiest for me to work with a clean slate even if you have already showered before coming to see me. Therefore, it is mandatory that you will shower upon arrival before we begin our session. You are also welcome to shower after session. Please arrive with trimmed nails and cuticles. Please also note that second day stubble hurts my soft skin. Please be clean shaven or have a beard or mustache but no stubble. I will provide mouthwash for you in the bathroom. Please use it as it is there for a reason. If you require alcohol-free mouthwash, then please let me know ahead of time.
If you plan on experiencing anal pleasure, please use an enema prior to our engagement.
My strong suggestion is that you purchase a Fleet enema or any equivalent brand at your local drug store. In order to administer, empty the enema bottle of the saline solution, refill the bottle with warm water only, squirt upwards while sitting upright into anal cavity while on the toilet or squatting in the shower, and do not hold it in — release it immediately! Repeat two or three times until your most immediate anal cavity is clean. I am not interested in clean intestines unless you are looking for a fisting! Please perform this an hour or two prior to session and not at my incall.
Shoe: 8.5US/39.5EU & Louboutin: 39
Lingerie: Small/Agent Provocateur Size 2 or 3
Hosiery: Wolford Medium/Agent Provocateur Size 2 or 3
Please see my Wish List for further specifics.
DO YOU WANT ME TO BRING ANYTHING TO SESSION?
Anything off my Wish List is a good start. I also adore sparkling water and fresh flowers. I no longer drink, but feel free to bring booze if you wish. I want you to be comfortable and relaxed during our session. Not a lot phases me, so feel free to party as much as you would like during session as there is no judgment from me. Unfortunately, my right to party has been revoked and has not yet been reinstated.
do you want me to leave a review for you:
Yes please but ask first!
Can i use you as a reference:
Absolutely and there is never a need to email me and ask for this privilege. You earned this in session! Simply provide my email address to the provider you wish to see. I am always happy to let other women know if their potential client is safe and gracious. That said, if I have only seen you once but you’re using me as a repeated reference, I suggest then that you use another provider with whom you are more familiar.
I am open to requests but definitely have my favorites from goth in the vein of Bauhaus to surf music channeling the Pulp Fiction soundtrack to my favorite Iggy Pop mix. If you enjoyed what you heard in session or want to get a better sense of my musical taste then please visit my Ramona Ryder YouTube channel.
If you are hearing impaired or very sensitive to sound and music hinders your enjoyment of a session, please notify me prior so that we can begin the scene without interruption.
YOU'RE MY FIRST PROVIDER OR KINK EXPERIENCE...
Lucky me! I love newbies and it is my passion to help people explore their sexuality. Basically, I specialize in making fantasies a reality so please do not be afraid to bring your desires to me. My sessions are a judgment free zone. As one client stated in a recent review, I will really “go there” with you in a way that makes one feel safe and comfortable. Please read my reviews to get a sense of my composure in session.
will you leave marks?
I am very careful to not leave you visibly marked post session unless given clear permission or upon request. But, if you ask for harder in the heat of the moment, I will give it to you, and it is your responsibility to accept your body's reaction. Please notify me if you are on blood thinners or Aspirin therapy or if you have thin skin that breaks easily prior to our meeting. If you are worried about bruising, please take oral arnicaprior to session and buy some arnica cream for post-session application.
FAVORITE KINK ACTIVITIES & SPECIALTIES OF YOUR MISTRESS:
ANAL PLAY: Strap-on, Prostate Massage, P-Spot Pleasure, Dildos, Anal Hooks, Plugs, Stretching, Milking, Fisting, Extreme Anal Play, Footing, Pegging
BONDAGE & MUMMIFICATION: Wrapping, Immobility, Cuffs, Chains, Predicament, etc
COCK AND BALL TORTURE (CBT): Cock & Ball Bondage/Separation, Needles, Squeezing, Temperature Play, etc
COLLARS, CHASTITY, & KEYHOLDING: Rituals & Ownership, Slave Training, Total Submission
CORPORAL: Caning, Whipping, Flogging, Crops, Paddling, Straps, Belts, etc
EDGE PLAY & ORGASM CONTROL: Let's see how long you can go...
E-STIM, ELECTRO PLAY, & EROTIC ELECTROSTIMULATION: Tens Unit, Violet Wand, Neon Wand, Tazapper
FACE SLAPPING: Bare Handed or with Leather or Latex Gloves
FEMINIZATION: Dress Up, Make Up, Stockings, Panties, Strap-On, Cock Worship, Gender Play, Role Play, Pegging, Little Slut, Beautiful Girl
FETISH WEAR: Leather, Latex, PVC, Fur, Vintage Lingerie/Pin-Up, School Girl, Punk, Goth, Innocent, Age Play, Ballet & Thigh High Boots
FOOT & BOOT WORSHIP: Bare Feet, Feet in Fetish Stockings i.e. Cuban Heel, Ballet Boots, Thigh High Boots, Strappy Heels, Platforms, Trampling, Foot Job, Footing
NEEDLE PLAY/PLAY PIERCING: I am highly trained in needle play & bloodborne pathogen safety
NIPPLE PLAY & NIPPLE TORTURE (NT): Sensual to Extreme- fingers, teeth, clamps, other instruments
OCCULT: Ritual, Witchcraft, & Divine Feminine Worship
POST-ORGASM: Torture, Milking, & Reflex Stimulation
ROLE PLAY: Seduction, Student/Teacher, Doctor/Nurse, Religious Scenarios, Affairs, Consensual Non-Consent, Puppy Play, Incest, Social & Societal Taboos, Feminization, & More
SENSORY DEPRIVATION: Visual, Audial, & Vacuum Bed
SENSATION PLAY: Fur, Leather, Silk, Wartenberg Pinwheels, Ice, Wax, Heat, Cold, Spikes, Stockings, & More
SOUNDS: Urethral & Cock Jewel (with or without temperature play)
SPANKING: Bare Handed or with Leather or Latex Gloves, Over The Knee (OTK)
TEASE & DENIAL: Severe Edging, Orgasm Control, Strip Tease, Toy Shows (Clit Pumping, Insertables), Withholding, Begging
VACUUM BED: Become immobilized in latex with the perfect tease hole for cock access and tube for breathing (no neck gasket) an additional $100 fee applies for these sessions
VENUS 2000: Ultimate Masturbation Milking Machine (allows one to reach orgasm with or without an erection), Sybian
WORSHIP: Bare Body Worship, Smothering, Queening, Legs, Breasts, High Heels, Feet, Pantyhose/Stockings
NOT INTO PAIN OR EXTREME KINK BUT STILL WANT TO BE DOMMED & TOPPED SENSUALLY? THEN I'M THE MISTRESS FOR YOU! SUBMIT TO ME & I WILL TAKE GOOD CARE OF YOU. TURN YOUR WILL OVER TO ME. LET ME TAKE COMPLETE CONTROL.
You're not a masochist? Then this sensual sadist will take it easy on you! I only enjoy inflicting pain if it turns you on. If you enjoy bondage, I can strap you down, tie you up, or chain you up and pleasure you to no end all without pain. This is one example of a kinky scenario that is not "vanilla" but is still a sensual experience and falls under the Kinky Amour umbrella.
If you are a nervous but curious novice, I can ease you into experiencing anal play, pegging, spanking, flogging, paddles, crops, and so on. I have introduced many kink newbies to a range of anal, stingy, thuddy, and whippy sensations in a gentle way which helped open up the endless possibilities of what can be experienced during BDSM play.
I enjoy classic lingerie, latex, leather, and vinyl/PVC. I have a penchant for Agent Provocateur and 1950s “pin-up” inspired pieces as well as actual vintage lingerie and accessories. I also adore a man who appreciates a good pair of stockings and I lust for Wolford nylons. Please ask me for my sizing for specific items or visit my Wish List if you’d wish to see some items I currently desire for session. For stockings and thigh-highs, I tend to be a medium and a small for all others.
YOUR HARD LIMITS AND BOUNDARIES:
Please tell me immediately if you have hard limits, psychological boundaries, physical limitations, or recent or lasting injuries as well as chronic pain. If you do not know what your “hard limits” are, be logical about it. For example, if you suffer from asthma you might want to tell me, “my hard limit is breath play — please do not choke me or suffocate me during session.” If you are claustrophobic, your hard limit would be not getting locked in a closet or wearing a hood. Many men tell me immediately that they do not like toilet training, humiliation, anal play, spitting, or feminization. Think about it and let me know these important facts on the contact form. These vocalized limits will always be respected.
my HARD LIMITS AND BOUNDARIES:
- Toilet play
- Scent play
- Ruby play
- Photographs and filming
- Bare back
- Enema administration
- Touching my head, hair, or face
- Degradation of any kind
- Drug play (pot is fine)
- Forced intoxication
- Smoking & smoking fetish
- Public play
- You getting drunk and actin' a fool
- Multiple emails when I have not responded to the last one
- Long emails
- Being told what to do
I adore role play! It's even in my astrological chart that I was born to be an actress. That said, scripts and lengthy role play descriptions are NOT appreciated. Always be concise when addressing your Mistress! If you must have me read a lengthy script or scene description, after I have agreed to explore your fantasy, there will be an additional $50 charge to be paid by my preferred manner.
what are your favorite role play scenarios?
I love playing naughty Nurse Ramona or the inappropriate psychiatrist Dr. Ryder who will cure you of your specific kinks and perversions through multiple treatments and techniques. I very much enjoy medical play and wearing a uniform. I additionally enjoy student/teacher scenarios due to the power exchange involved where I punish you for a bad grade I received at your hand and put you through hell to raise my GPA. Or maybe I'm a sexually harassing boss or interviewer for that job you so desperately need. I can and usually will go to very dark places and do "taboo" scenes so just ask! If I listed everything I enjoy doing, this list would be endless...
WEBSITE AND PHOTOGRAPHY CREDITS:
It took great effort endless hours to design this site in collaboration with my assistant. All the writing on the site is mine and mine alone. If you can’t tell from my blog, I am a writer.
My primary photos were shot by Elizabeth Raab with Seth Asbell doing my hair and makeup. Other photographers featured in my gallery consist of Jellyfish Jones, Kristin Cofer, and Jackie of Gagged Fantasy.
If your new client used me as a reference and you need a reference from me, do NOT fill out my contact form. Please ask your potential client to provide my email address and contact me that way.
When emailing me, please include the following information:
- Client Name
- Client Email Address
- Client Phone Number
- Link to your website and/or ads as to verify you as an established provider
If you are writing or rewriting your website, I suggest that you do not have another provider’s site open as you write your own ad copy as inadvertently, you will steal content. Stealing is never in good taste and rarely goes unnoticed.
I’d be happy to chat with you about screening, safety, and provide other resources. Hopefully you in turn will do the same thing with other women after you are more established. I will help only when asked and at my discretion. My biggest gripe in the industry is when women do not help other women. It is a community not a competition.
Feel free to copy paste the HTML code below in order to add my banner to your site and contact me for a reciprocal banner posting.