THE FAQ

Everything you need to know before reaching out to your Mistress!

To get to what you’re looking for, use the links below:

PROTOCOL ✧ OUR TIME TOGETHER ✧ GENERAL FAQ ✧ KINK FAQ

FRIENDS PAGE ✧ CREDITS + ANSWERS

BOOKING, CONTACT, SCREENING, & PROTOCOL

  • Fill out my contact form. Keep it brief- introduce yourself, state what kind of session you are interested in, and include two provider references (name, email, and website). Mistress loves brevity! A provider is not a reference if they do not have a website. If you are new with no references, a LinkedIn or professional website works to start (read below). I will act as a reference anytime after seeing you, can whitelist you on TER, and OK you on P411. If you refuse to provide me with a phone number then I will refuse to see you. If you are not new to this world, but screening without references, you need to make it clear to me that I am not your first.

  • If you have no references then, where you would enter provider references on my contact form, please provide me with the following: a link to your public LinkedIn profile and/or a link to a professional business website. If you do not have either, please write me a nice, courteous message explaining that you do not have either but offer other ways that you can prove your identity in order to make me feel secure that you’re not Ted Bundy.

    Once your contact form is received, and if it looks like you are an intelligent and thoughtful human being, I will write back and request that one or all of the following be provided to me: a photograph of a government issued ID with personal information covered or blurred out (such as your home address) but leaving your full name, date of birth, and photo, a public LinkedIn, work ID with your picture, a photo of your business card, or an email sent to me from your business email may also be required. Most unexpired government issued IDs will suffice in addition to professional looking work information to prove to me that you are a functional human. Following my instructions and jumping through my hoops also proves your devotion and ability to follow directions.

  • As far in advance as you can! I do not accept same-day, next-day, or rarely same-week requests. Being booked out several weeks or even months ahead is completely normal for me. Patience is essential and my favorite quality in a man. Tours fill up fast so book with me as soon as you find out. Get on my city-specific mailings lists to be the first to hear about new tours!

  • I will reply by email, within a week, if you followed directions. Please wait until I contact you and do not follow up if you do not hear back for a few days. I will reply to confirm a date and time, get you screened, and then I will ask for a reservation fee. Please do not send the fee until I explicitly request it. If you must contact me to get my attention, before my response, then utilize my wish list.

    • Always reply to our last email thread- try not to start a new one.

    • Wait for my reply before following up. Nudge me politely if time-sensitive and over one week.

    • Keep all messages short and to the point.

    • After our first meeting, email only- no calls, texts, or P411 messages.

    For those interested in discretion please read my blog on how to not get caught.

DEPOSIT, TRIBUTE, & RESERVATION FEE

  • My reservation fee is non-refundable and does not apply toward the session tribute. If you need to reschedule, a new one is required for the new date unless it is an act of Goddess like a horrible snowstorm grounding all flights. Do not send this fee until I ask for it. I do my reservation fees in angel numbers such as $333 for a three-hour session or $444 for a four-hour session to keep our session lucky. The reservation fee rarely goes above $444 unless it is a session of eight hours or more in which I may ask for a deposit that goes toward the tribute when we meet.

  • Electronic gift cards are to be sent to my private email only, which you will know when I respond to your contact form. I rarely check my public email RamonaRyderNYC at gmail dot com. Electronic Amazon, Whole Foods, or Uber gift cards are used to reserve our appointment. Cash App or Bitcoin are also acceptable. PLEASE DO NOT PUT A NOTE OF ANY KIND- but you need to include a note for Cash App so say, “for cat treats” or “for leather” and so on- keep it vanilla and try and make me smile. You can give me cash when we meet, as a deposit for next time, if you know you want to see me again.

    • Three hours: $3,000- my minimum

    • Four hours indoors $4500

    • Four-hour lunch date $3500

    • Four-hour dinner date $4000

    • Six to eight hours: that number × $1,000 with an outdoor activity

    • Overnight (approximately 16 hours such as 6pm-10am): $14,000

    • Anything longer: I will be happy to discuss :)

    First-time clients should pay in cash only- hundred-dollar bills only, organized and front-facing, with or without an envelope. Established clients may rarely use Cash App, Venmo, Zelle, or Bitcoin. Hand me the tribute if you are coming to my place and, if I go to you, leave the tribute in the bathroom, in stacks of $1000.

    • 48 hours to 25 hours notice: 50% of tribute

    • Within 24 hours: full tribute

    • Overnight, within same week: 50% of tribute

    • Overnight, within 48 hours: full tribute

    • Tour, within two weeks: 50% of tribute

    • Tour, within one week: full tribute 

    My time is valuable​: deposits are never refundable or transferable unless there is an act of Goddess. All cancellation tributes are due within 48 hours of ​notification.​ I would suggest texting my 917 number given to you during booking, on top of your emailed cancellation, so that I am sure to receive the notice.

GIFTING & MORE FOR YOUR MISTRESS

  • An open mind and a good attitude! If you want to bring a gift, not required, then anything off my wish list is a good start. I adore still water in glass and fresh flowers. I prefer to only receive flowers while home in NYC. I love dark red, pink, or white roses, peonies, and ranunculus. Please do not bring me any food or sweets. If you want to feed me then I suggest a lunch or dinner date. I do not drink alcohol. For a practical gift, then a physical Amazon, Whole Foods, or Uber gift card is perfect. Please see my wish list or Instagram highlight called “wish list” for more ideas. 

  • I love first edition or signed books by people like Eve Babitz, Hunter S. Thompson, and William S. Burroughs. I also love it when you donate to the charities on my wish list page. Rescue Spa gift certificates are perfect sent to my public or private email address and addressed to Ramona Ryder. The wish list highlight on my Instagram has cool stuff like taxidermy.

  • Merely reply to the last email exchanged between us and suggest another date preference, how long you wish to session, and an approximate time slot. Do not text, call, or message me on P411 or any other platform. Do not resubmit a contact form. Email is always the best way to communicate with me after we are established.

  • Yes please but ask first! TER and PrivateDelights are a great place to do this and I encourage reviews.

  • I do accept cryptocurrency (Bitcoin only) as a way to receive a deposit for a session and I usually do not accept it as payment for sessions unless discussed in advance. Cash App or Coinbase are easy to navigate platforms for new cryptocurrency users.

  • Email me first and ask for this privilege. Do not give out my information without permission. Privacy and discretion goes both ways.

  • I am open to requests but definitely have my favorites from goth in the vein of Bauhaus to surf music channeling the Pulp Fiction soundtrack to my favorite 70s punk mix. If you enjoyed what you heard in session or want to get a better sense of my musical taste, then please visit my Ramona Ryder YouTube channel.

    If you are hearing impaired or very sensitive to sound and music hinders your enjoyment of a session, please notify me prior so that we can begin the scene without interruption.

Kink FAQ

Interests, Favorites, Wardrobe, & Hard Limits

  • Lucky me! I love newbies and it is my passion to help people explore their sexuality. Basically, I specialize in making fantasies a reality so please do not be afraid to bring your desires to me. My sessions are a judgment free zone. As one client stated in a recent review, I will really “go there” with you in a way that makes one feel safe and comfortable. Please read my reviews to get a sense of my composure in session.

  • I am very careful to not leave you visibly marked post session unless given clear permission or upon request. But, if you ask for harder in the heat of the moment, I will give it to you, and it is your responsibility to accept your body's reaction. Please notify me if you are on blood thinners or Aspirin therapy or if you have thin skin that breaks easily prior to our meeting. If you are worried about bruising, please take oral arnica prior to session, for up to three days prior, and buy some arnica cream or gel for post-session application.

  • ANAL PLAY: Dildos by hand not strap-on, curved metal wand Njoy fun wand, manual prostate massage, general P-spot pleasure, prostate orgasm, and fisting for the most hardcore. More anal play information is available on my Anal Pleasure page. My “Our Time Together” section in the beginning of my FAQ has instructions for how to clean yourself properly for anal pleasure under the Hygiene section.

    BONDAGE: Leather cuffs, leather ties, bondage tape, and sometimes mummification with cling wrap.

    COCK AND BALL TORTURE (CBT): Self explanitory.

    CORPORAL: Caning, whipping, flogging, crops, paddles, straps, and more.

    EDGING, TANTRA, AND ORGASM CONTROL: Let's see how long I can edge your orgasm.

    E-STIM, ELECTRO PLAY, AND EROTIC ELECTROSTIMULATION: Violet wand. You must inform me in advance if you have diabetes, heart disease, high blood pressure, a pacemaker, or an insulin pump, as electro play cannot be performed under those conditions. Travel fee applies for e-stim kit travel.

    FACE SLAPPING AND SPANKING: Bare-handed or with leather or latex gloves, wet or dry. I decide who can handle the pain and when it will deepen our connection. I decide who is my masochist. Sensual pain only.

    FETISH WEAR AND CHARACTER DRESS: Leather, latex (at my discretion for only real fetishists), PVC boots, OTK/thigh-high leather boots, vintage lingerie or pin-up, nun habit, nurse, secretary and office wear, punk, goth, innocent, extreme heels, and more. Never fully nude ever- garters with stockings or waist-cinchers are required. DO NOT request an outfit that you have never seen me in UNLESS you are offering to buy it for me.

    LATEX AND LEATHER: I enjoy wearing latex and leather and take pleasure in presenting a wide array of fetish and fantasy attire. I must be wearing a garter or waist-cincher at all times and will never be completely naked. Only one outfit per session unless you’ve very special.

    NEEDLE PLAY AND PLAY PIERCING: I am highly trained in needle play and blood-borne pathogen safety.

    NIPPLE PLAY AND NIPPLE TORTURE (NT): Sensual to extreme- fingers, teeth, clamps, and other instruments.

    ROLE PLAY: I am a dominant woman, and most of you are poor actors, so maybe we can just play ourselves when we first meet? Role play is best with those who really get into it so the scene does not get broken.

    SENSORY DEPRIVATION: Visual, auditory, and vacuum bed (if provided).

    SENSATION PLAY: Fur, Wartenberg pinwheels, vampire gloves, nails, claws, spikes, stockings, and more.

    SOUNDS: Sensual urethral sounds.

    TEASE AND DENIAL (T&D): Orgasm control and sensual edging.

    VENUS 2000: Ultimate masturbation milking machine, capable of producing orgasm with or without erection. Travel fee applies.

    WORSHIP: Body worship, smothering, queening, face-sitting, legs, breasts, high heels, feet, pantyhose, and stockings. If you don’t actually have a foot fetish then do not request feet. I get pedicures for my foot fetish men, no extra cost, and take their requests seriously. If you just want to try it, but are not sure that you like it, then go to Pandora’s Box or something.

    NOT INTO PAIN OR EXTREME KINK BUT STILL WANT TO BE DOMINATED AND SENSUALLY CONTROLLED? THEN I'M THE MISTRESS FOR YOU. SUBMIT, AND I WILL TAKE CARE OF YOU. SURRENDER YOUR CONTROL AND ALLOW ME TO TAKE THE LEAD.

    Not a masochist? This sensual kinky escort adapts to your desires. I only inflict pain when it enhances your experience. If you enjoy bondage, I can restrain you for extended periods without pain, creating an experience that is deeply immersive, intimate, and far from ordinary as I use you for my pleasure.

  • I enjoy classic lingerie (Agent Provocateur and Bordelle are my favorites!), latex (at my discretion), rubber, leather, vinyl, PVC, and classic 1950s “pin-up” inspired pieces. I adore a man who appreciates a good pair of stockings and I lust for Wolford nylons. Please ask me for my sizing for specific items or visit my Wish List if you’d wish to see some items I currently desire for session. For stockings and thigh-highs, I tend to be a medium and a small for all others. DO NOT REQUEST ANY OUTFIT THAT YOU HAVE NEVER SEEN ME IN UNLESS YOU ARE OFFERING TO BUY IT FOR ME.

  • Please tell me immediately if you have hard limits, psychological boundaries, physical limitations, or recent or lasting injuries as well as chronic pain. If you do not know what your “hard limits” are, be logical about it. For example, if you are claustrophobic, your hard limit would be wearing a hood but maybe a blindfold is OK. Many men tell me immediately that they do not like certain things which I appreciate- it’s good to know what we want and don’t want. Think about it and let me know these important facts on the contact form. These vocalized limits will always be respected.

    DO NOT TELL ME HARD LIMITS OF ACTIVITIES ON MY OWN “NO” LIST. IT SHOWS YOU HAVEN’T READ MY FAQ I.E. PISS PLAY. DO NOT WASTE MY TIME- ONLY TELL ME ABOUT LEAVING MARKS, RECENT INJURIES, HEMORRHOIDS, ETC.

    • Touching my face or neck

    • Toilet play i.e. piss play or scat

    • Ruby play

    • Photographs and filming

    • Bare back

    • Oil or massage of any kind

    • Forced bi with a stud or cuckold fantasy with a third

    • Feminization or “sissification”

    • Enema administration

    • Degradation of any race, gender, sex, sexuality, body type, or religion

    • Smoking & smoking fetish

    • Scent play

    • You wearing heavy cologne or scents

    • Multiple emails when I have not responded to the prior one

    • Long emails or responses

    • Drug play and forced intoxication

    • Black lipstick and lipstick in general (my lips are tattooed red)

    • A third person for our first date who is not known to me

    • Watches- especially Apple watches worn during session

  • I adore role play! It's even in my astrological chart that I was born to be an actress. That said, scripts and lengthy role play descriptions are NOT appreciated. Always be concise when addressing your Mistress! No consensual non-conscent (CNC) as everything we do involves consent.

  • I love playing naughty Nurse Ramona or the inappropriate psychiatrist Dr. Ryder who will cure you of your specific kinks and perversions through multiple treatments and techniques. I very much enjoy medical play, such as needles and sounds, and wearing a uniform. School girl is a maybe. Office play is great. Succubus requests annoy me.

Credits

  • This kinky goth punk escort based in NYC is a multifaceted character with a life story that's never been boring. I have lived many lifetimes before becoming your Mistress. Get to know me better by reading my bio page. I hope you are a part of my future!

  • It took great effort and endless hours to design this site in collaboration with Erin Black of Black Ash Consulting. Black Ash Consulting designed and custom-coded my site, and I created all the content. Again, all the writing on the site is mine and mine alone. It is insulting to question whether I wrote my own ad copy. I am a writer if you can’t tell already from my blog which I call Musings on my site.

    My primary photos were shot by Elizabeth Raab, Hello Miss Photography, Inamorata, Point of Vue, and Alexandra Kacha.

  • CLIENT REFERENCES:

    If your new client used me as a reference and you need a reference from me, do NOT fill out my contact form. Please ask your potential client to provide my email address and contact me that way. 

    When emailing me, please include the following information:

    • Client Name

    • Client Email Address

    • Client Phone Number

    • Link to your website and/or ads as to verify you as an established provider

    AD COPY:

    If you are writing or rewriting your website, I suggest that you do not have another provider’s site open as you write your own ad copy as inadvertently, you will steal content. Stealing is never in good taste and rarely goes unnoticed.

    NEW PROVIDERS:

    I’d be happy to chat with you about screening, safety, and provide other resources. Hopefully, you’ll in turn, do the same thing with other providers after you are more established. I will only help when asked and at my discretion. My biggest gripe in the industry is when we do not help each other. It is a community not a competition- there’s enough sun on the beach for everyone!

Biography, Website & Photography Credits, & Notes for Fellow Providers