Your NYC Mistress

call girl /ˈkôl ˌɡərl/ noun

a female sex worker who accepts appointments by phone or online rather than working in a brothel or on the street

I've never been much of a phone Mistress. My protocol has always been clear: contact form, set a date, screening, fantasies and requests, hard limits- all handled via encrypted email. A polite (Signal) text the day of a tryst with your ETA or arrival is all I require of you with your phone. I don't text for planning and I definitely don't chat. If you want casual banter, try a 900 number. These days, the only time I really meet a real telephone is when I'm draped in a loose hotel robe, naked beneath, ordering room service after one of our decadent escapades. And even then, the phone's usually fighting for nightstand space with my Mistress toys and an array of lubes. Spoiler: it often loses.

Above is Mistress on one of her wild road trips and below at a Bound party (emphasize sonic and hedonistic encounters) at Fotogafiska (RIP)…

This little love note is a tribute to one of my eccentric passions- telephones and all their nostalgic glory. You'll find photos from my archives and beyond: me playing spy at the now-defunct KGB Espionage Museum, a cheeky mirror selfie (because of course), up to no good in a booth at the Winter Show Art Fair at the Park Avenue Armory, one of the last pay phones in NYC, and a shot from my very first professional shoot to start. Yes, that's baby Ramona!

To recap: I'm technically a call girl but I'll always choose a well-crafted note over a casual “u avail” text. Still, I'll admit it: I'm obsessed with telephones. I even got to see Dalí's Lobster Telephone, also known as Aphrodisiac Telephone, in person at The Met. As always, art imitates life.

You make my heart skip a beat every time my inbox dings!
xo Ramona Ryder