Demand Exceeds Availability


My popularity continues to exceed my availability as an exclusive and low-volume Mistress...


If you have seen me in 2019, or follow the instructions listed below, then these new rates will not apply to you. I will be implementing the following new rates on November 1st:

  • 60 MINUTES - $1000 (Established: $800)

  • 90 MINUTES - $1300 (Established: $1100)

  • 120 MINUTES: $1600 (Established: $1500)

  • 180 MINUTES: $2300 (Established: $2200)

  • DINNER DATE: $2500 (Same)

  • OVERNIGHT: $5000 (Same)

  • 24 HOURS: $6000 (Same)

Greek plus more dirty deeds are always included


You are automatically locked into our previously established tribute if you have already seen me in 2019 or are scheduled to see me (with a received deposit) before the end of the year.

If you cannot see me before the end of this year, but plan to see me in the future in NYC or during a frequent tour to San Francisco, Los Angeles, Portland, Washington, D.C., Boston, or Chicago where I will definitely be visiting in 2020, then you can reply to this mailer for instructions on how to get me a $200 ($250 Bitcoin) non-refundable retainer to lock in my current tribute amount. An alternative to sending this retainer is to gift me $175 or more off of my wish lists on Net-A-Porter or Amazon by November 1st to lock yourself into my current tribute amount.

Philadelphia, Pittsburgh, Seattle, Asheville, Las Vegas, and New Orleans are all places I'd like to visit in 2020 but my schedule is not yet set. If you live in one of these cities and would like to send a retainer to lock in my current tribute, I will definitely visit your city. Simply can't wait? Fly me to you is always an option!.


I love the rave reviews you have left for me on PrivateDelights and I keep my praise page up to date with your reactions to Ramona magic.

Thank you for all your support no matter what form it takes from simple likes on my Twitter posts to regular sessions.

Your Mistress,

xx Ramona Ryder


Here are the provider-friendly sites that I advertise with that avoid the exploitative aspects that frequently ruin many of the other sites with similar purposes:



Looking for a Good Time in Good Conscience


It's a weird time out there for providers. Eros turned over all of our government issued IDs to Homeland Security during the raid of its North Carolina headquarters in 2017. This breach of trust has mostly impacted foreign providers trying to cross into the US, even when not working, as they get turned away and told that they are banned without explanation. This includes providers who blur their face online. Now you know how we get verified on sites and the risk we take to prove that our ads are real.

Eros has also stolen money from me and countless other providers and has terrible customer service. One is unable to get in touch with a representative unlike Tryst, Slixa, and P411 that are more responsive and respectful to their customers. I have been boycotting Eros since they turned over our IDs and you should, too. They should have either a) not kept them after verifying us or b) had them on secure offshore servers that could not be accessed physically in the US.

I don't have any beef with any other currently active advertising platforms but the now defunct, in the United States, TER had a hell of a history. I loved TER as a platform because I had amazing 10/10 reviews, and got a deluge of amazing clients off it, but TER did not exist as a boon for sex workers.


Review boards are a contentious topic in my industry. The Erotic Review (TER) in particular had a very bad reputation with sex workers due to its general rude treatment of providers by their moderators, encouragement of locker room talk, and overall objectification of women. Eros is not the only site that has rude or dismissive customer service.

David Elms, TER’s founder, is a sketchy motherfucker. His dastardliness was apparent in many ways; he forced a sex worker to perform oral sex on him at gunpoint and tried to hire a hitman to murder another woman. I did not know about David Elms’ dark history and the bad energy surrounding TER until after SESTA/FOSTA facilitated the shuttering of TER in the USA. If I had known, you bet your ass I would have boycotted them like Eros.

TER was not founded on respect for providers nor by a man who wanted what was best for sex workers; the founder did not care about our safety. David Elms started the site because he felt he was getting “ripped off” and there were no consequences for, what he perceived to be poor service. Therefore, TER was essentially started as an act of revenge against escorts and seemed to encourage this mentality and behavior.

This attitude makes me uncomfortable on so many levels. In my opinion, men need to screen providers just as we need to screen clients; both parties are responsible for their own safety and satisfaction. Men should have a pretty fair idea of what they are getting into before they meet any provider, from a provider’s portrayal online to her introductory exchanges in communication. This is why sites like PrivateDelights, that allows respectful reviews, and P411, are extremely helpful if you want more information when booking a provider.


The only site currently that is a legit "review platform" is PrivateDelights. Their servers are offshore and they treat providers way better than the more famous review site TER, even though they are very overwhelmed right now and slow to respond to providers and clients alike. P411 is another site where providers are pre-screened as are the clients.

P411 has an "OK" system, similar to provider verified reviews on PrivateDelights where you can validate that a client is safe to see. P411 is currently accepting new members and I will vouch for any client that I have seen if you want to join the P411 community or want an OK on their site from me. If you have seen me and want to leave a PrivateDelights review (feel free to be explicit- it is up to the provider) then I will verify it and signal to other providers that you are safe to see.

I hope this information provided some insight into what we deal with when advertising and where to find us in good conscience. I would not support Eros as they do not support us. I would support a sex worker run platform with offshore servers like Tryst to find providers. Slixa has a dazzling array of providers on their site and amazing customer service. P411 recently helped me due to a "no call, no show" and warned the man that this was unacceptable. If men are dangerous or disrespectful, P411 will remove them from the site. PrivateDelights also operates this way and bans dangerous men and removes fake reviews.

You have a lot of power deciding what sites you peruse and how you find us. Use your power for good and help us thrive using the platforms that treat us with respect and also prioritize online safety and discretion.


Here are the sites I use for advertising and that I stand behind with links to each site:






I've included some photos from my last shoot with my favorite photographer, Elizabeth Raab, and I hope you enjoyed seeing me in purple.

Your Mistress,
xx Ramona Ryder

Motorcycle Mistress

On a 1978 Honda CB550 Four top of Bernal Heights, SF at night

On a 1978 Honda CB550 Four top of Bernal Heights, SF at night

I swear the ENTIRE time I lived in the Bay it was 60 degrees and in a drought— perfect motorcycle leather weather every day. This is probably why this New Yorker stayed for almost eight years.


When I was living in San Francisco in my early 20s, I passed my road test, bought a 1980 Honda CM 400T at a steal in Berkeley, and taught myself to ride at night. This was pretty sketchy as I did not yet know how to drive stick and the hills were insane in SF but I lived to tell the tale.

My motorcycle was my main mode of transportation (besides a bicycle) for years in both San Francisco and Oakland. I used my bike to go to my PO Box where I had vinyl records delivered (see above photo), grocery shopping, punk shows, and just about everywhere. I had more of my friends (and a lot of guys) on the back of both of my bikes.


I got my second motorcycle, a 1978 CB550 K, after I got hit on my CM400 in 2016. I didn't stop riding- I just went up a size and gave my banged up bike to a friend to work on. My CB550 was a total beast- it was really loud, mean, and heavy. My first bike will forever have my heart- even though she was smaller, she had a lot of spunk; I outraced all my friends on Hogs (at least at the light) and left men in Porsches in the dust who catcalled me.


Eventually I got my CM400 back and had two bikes. I decided to sell my smaller one to my little punk brother so he could get a reliable first bike. The photo below is of me on a hot summer night in my old garage in Oakland. Having two motorcycles in my very own garage and a place to work on my bikes was a total dream. I gave my CB550 to a friend before I left for NYC but I'm itching to get a new bike once I settle back into NYC some more.


I'll forever be a vintage Japanese motorcycle enthusiast and I look forward to hearing about your adventures on two wheels.

Your Mistress,
xx Ramona Ryder

Smut With a Purpose

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Despite the questionable elements of sex worker review sites, such as objectifying women, there are benefits for both providers and clients to using these sites for mutual screening. Review boards, such as The Erotic Review (TER) when it was still active in the USA or currently PrivateDelights, can be helpful when confirming any initial inklings of doubt about certain suiters.

In the past, if a potential client seemed a bit off in their initial tone, when TER was still active, I would then go read their reviews. Seeing chronic behavior of mostly rating providers as 6's and 7's and saying derogatory things about them, confirmed that my initial sense of something being off was correct. If a potential client is always picking girls who he deems a “6/7” then he is not doing his due diligence when seeing providers, hates women, is impossible to satisfy, or all of the aforementioned.

I don’t want to see difficult clients, likewise, my clients don’t want to invest their money and time in difficult providers. One of my clients stated the following when I ran the concept of this blog by him, “One thing I think about with the lack of reviews out there after SESTA/FOSTA is that it cuts out some clients. There is a class of client that is too scared to see “street workers” but paying hundreds of dollars for an “escort" is a huge expense that they don't take lightly. So, reviews may help entice them to spend the money. This is also true for guys who aren't experienced hobbyists.”

Reading that feedback from him made me realize that, not only did I feel safer by being able to see what men wrote about previous providers, but men felt safer by being able to see reviews, as well. I think everyone should feel safe and be safe when meeting face to face. Hobbyist culture has its issues, but it also has the potential to bring a sense of ease to first encounters in a world where our first-time mystery dates can cause anxiety.

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Considering that I was #3 in San Francisco on TER and, at one point, in the international top 20, I can’t say that I disagreed with most of the reviews that were written about me. Those reviews put men at ease before they met me; they knew that I was a verified good time and worth the effort. Those amazing reviews left for me on TER brought so many wonderful clients into my life and the reviews left on PrivateDelights so far have done the same.

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I delight in reading my reviews on a voyeuristic level. Some of my reviews, especially on TER, were very well-written and sensually poetic. My reviews prove that I am not just a notch on a client’s belt, but that I am their Mistress who they respect and value. The steamy reviews left for me are also enjoyable because it turns me on reading the renditions of our hedonism. Having reviews posted about me acts almost as a sex scrapbook; it’s sad that my TER reviews are gone but I have enjoyed the reviews left for me in the wake of SESTA/FOSTA on PrivateDelights.

To those of you I have not yet met or those of you who have yet to leave me a review- I look forward to a future together of making new memories, published or unpublished.

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Your Mistress,
xx Ramona Ryder

P.S. It seems the closest site currently mimicking the now defunct Night Shift or RedBook is PrivateDelights although it suggests, for the courtesy of providers, to not leave explicit reviews. That said, I encourage my clients to leave me explicit reviews and I will not request that PrivateDelights take them down. PrivateDelights leaves it up to the provider's discretion if the review stays up or is removed.

P.P.S. The typewriter in the photographs is my 1940's Remington Rand Deluxe Model 5 Portable Typewriter that I restored and still use regularly.

DISCLAIMER: I am very grateful that I can pick and choose who I see as a client and I know that I am very privileged in this regard. I support fellow sex workers from all backgrounds and will continue to be a resource and ally when any verified provider contacts me for a reference. I regularly and generously donate to pro-sex worker organizations that serve more marginalized providers and I can provide recommendations of organizations that need your support.



In September of 2011, I traded my hometown of NYC for San Francisco in order to work at a punk magazine, which would become a more-than-full-time job helping to distribute the last vestiges of international DIY zine culture. The magazine gig would provide me with free housing in exchange for this labor of punk rock love. I made the cross-country journey in a rented SUV filled with records, books, black clothes, and leather jackets. I drove because I was too scared to ship my precious vinyl, fearing that they could get lost or damaged in transit. I also had a preference of exploring America via the road, making stops along the way to see dear friends I knew from having toured in bands.

Joan Jett, of the Runaways and the Blackhearts, used this Gibson to record such hits as "I Love Rock 'n' Roll" & "Bad Reputation."

Joan Jett, of the Runaways and the Blackhearts, used this Gibson to record such hits as "I Love Rock 'n' Roll" & "Bad Reputation."

When I transitioned from the overtime job there to a less active role, I went from pretty swank punk house conditions near SF’s renowned Haight district (we had the world’s largest punk record collection, a garage, two-stories, and a courtyard) to the garage rocker version of Animal House in the Excelsior district. There was even a vintage Honda motorcycle on the roof (we lived up a serious flight of stairs) and no one remembered how it got there. Sometimes a band would be practicing in the room next to mine, full amps and all, and I’d often get up to go to work early in the morning to find last night’s party still raging in my kitchen. I’d be making my morning smoothie with kale as bleary rock ’n’ rollers in the kitschy 60s kitchen did lines. For $250 a month though, it was well worth it.

Keith Richards decorated this guitar which appeared in Jean-Luc Goddard's 1968 "Sympathy for the Devil."

Keith Richards decorated this guitar which appeared in Jean-Luc Goddard's 1968 "Sympathy for the Devil."

I really had to hustle in my early 20s. I managed to keep my living expenses low in Brooklyn and continued this lifestyle in the Bay so that I could prioritize punk and creativity. That place in the Excelsior had members of the band No Bunny living in two large, walk-in closets. One closet resident said that he had moved to San Francisco to live in the closet - a stupid joke, but it always stuck with me. The apartment had a typical old-school San Francisco Mission layout, with wood built-ins everywhere, French doors, glass doorknobs, gorgeous moldings, and my room was complete with a bay window.

It was fun living in garage rocker hell with those bands and the frequently ensuing chaos. I tend to listen to mostly older music from the 1970s and 80s. The bands that came in and out of that apartment played modern versions of those earlier genres, retaining that vintage “fuck you” sound. I adore that “fuck society” brand of rock ‘n’ roll guitar. Living in a place that was all about loud guitars and breaking the rules was a regular source for memorable experiences, up until we got evicted that is. Ah, the memories!

I’ve been reminiscing recently about my humble early days in 2011, living paycheck to paycheck in communal chaos, heading out to the West Coast, and the process I went through leading me to eventually leave the Bay seven years later. I arrived with very little and left as a home-owner with an 805-credit score- what a journey the past few years in California have been!


One of the first things I did when I got back to New York in April was to go my beloved Metropolitan Museum of Art, where they currently have an exhibit called Play It Loud: Instruments of Rock & Roll. This was a perfect welcome-home experience for this rock ‘n’ roll lover. I wanted to share with you a few adventures from my move out to San Francisco, a taste of the raucous times I had there, and my eventual return home to my roots. My life will always revolve around loud music and sex. Ever since first hearing the Rolling Stones, and catching my first crush on the minister’s son at Sunday School, I’ve lived a rebellious and sensual life.


I named my private dungeon in-call in the Bay “Electric Ladyland” as a homage to one of my many bad boy crushes and musical loves, Jimi Hendrix. Those who visited me there enjoyed post-coital bliss under ceiling mirrors whilst listening to the Rolling Stones and probably reminiscing about our first concerts. I share with you some images of my favorite guitars from the Met exhibit, especially Jimi’s electric guitar fragment from Monterey Pop and Joan Jett’s Gibson, in addition to some shots of me fooling around on the acoustic guitar during my last Hollywood photoshoot.

Jimi Hendrix had a preference for Fender Stratocasters and used this during his 1969 Woodstock performance where he did his famous rendition of the "Star Spangled Banner."

Jimi Hendrix had a preference for Fender Stratocasters and used this during his 1969 Woodstock performance where he did his famous rendition of the "Star Spangled Banner."

Hendrix was left-handed and famously played right-handed guitars restrung and upside down.

Hendrix was left-handed and famously played right-handed guitars restrung and upside down.

My favorite piece from the "Play it Loud" exhibit: Jimi Hendrix's electric guitar fragment from 1967 during the iconic ritualized sacrifice of his guitar during the Monterey Pop Festival where he dropped to his knees, doused his guitar in lighter fluid, set it ablaze, and then smashed it.

My favorite piece from the "Play it Loud" exhibit: Jimi Hendrix's electric guitar fragment from 1967 during the iconic ritualized sacrifice of his guitar during the Monterey Pop Festival where he dropped to his knees, doused his guitar in lighter fluid, set it ablaze, and then smashed it.

I had to be true to myself and trade the acoustic vibes of the Bay for the electric streets of New York City. For me, being back in New York City is like that moment that Dylan plugged in at Newport; he may have electrocuted some fans who weren’t ready for change, but he continued to positively electrify most others. Dylan never fully left his acoustic past and I promise that I’ll visit the Bay Area often.

Who doesn't want to rock 'n' roll all night? Ibanez electric guitar circa 1979 belonging to Paul Stanley of Kiss.

Who doesn't want to rock 'n' roll all night? Ibanez electric guitar circa 1979 belonging to Paul Stanley of Kiss.

All guitars are good guitars- let’s turn it up to 11 wherever our paths may cross.

Your Mistress,
xx Ramona Ryder



I have always been interested in the art of seduction. Physical attraction, sexual power dynamics, nylons, corsets, lingerie, fetish, BDSM, and anything deemed taboo have bewitched me for as long as I can remember. I recall watching Disney movies and obsessing over Ariel’s bikini top, appreciating the way her scaled hips moved, and also wanting to emulate Jessica Rabbit. Before long, I was admiring Morticia Addams, who is more a reflection of my current reality. My online persona is a curated version of me but ultimately, Ramona Ryder is no act, although I am famous for my sessions involving role play.


I am passionate about my vocation and have no doubt that being your Mistress is my true calling in life. I get to explore my sensual interests and live by the pleasure principle versus having to compartmentalize myself like I did when I still had an office job. I have no boss and I only session with people whom I genuinely want to see. I have a firm rule with myself to not let a financial transaction be the sole or driving factor as to whether or not I decide to see someone. I don’t let anyone into my sacred space, much less touch me, unless I truly want to engage. Since I only see new clients whose initial communication with me has sparked a feeling of connection, the likelihood that we’ll have more in common than just lust is greatly increased. Written communication is your opportunity to make a good first impression, but ideally it can be the onset of our foreplay. After all, the sexiest part of the human body is the mind.


I always get a few butterflies before seeing a client. Whether it’s an initial encounter or our 25th dinner date, it feels like the first time for me every bespoke session- I put the same amount of care and effort into each meeting. I generally avoid men who make a habit out of seeing a lot of women. If you’re a hobbyist out there sport-fucking everyone, then there’s little chance for a valued connection. If you find yourself scheduled to see me then consider yourself special. I am selective for my own safety, but also because I like the idea that seeing a provider can be meaningful experience. I will figure out what makes you tick given the opportunity and I hope that we get to keep ticking together for a long time to come.

Your Mistress,
xx Ramona Ryder


TO PROVIDERS: I recognize that I am privileged in an industry where many women don’t feel they have the luxury to pick and choose with whom they get to engage. Whatever your circumstances are, I hope that you can make it a priority to trust your intuition when deciding to see a new client. My current suggestions for screening are to request two provider references from clients from providers with websites or verified online ads. Most providers request that the references provided by clients have been seen within the past year. If they have no references then I request LinkedIn account information and a photograph of their driver’s license with their full name, date of birth, and a photo visible (all other information can be blocked out). I have a specific section on my FAQ that addresses what you could do with clients without provider references. Some providers opt to call men at work to verify their identity and employment status, but I find this method to be invasive and potentially problematic, so I don’t personally use it. In addition to the above information, I also use VerifyHim and SafeOffice to screen clients to see if they are on any national blacklists for time-wasting or more serious offenses such as stalking, harassment or violence. Truthfinder has been suggested as another resource, but I can’t yet vouch for it as I have yet to use it. If you have any questions on how to screen potential clients, or on how to use any of the aforementioned resources, then please don’t hesitate to direct message me on Twitter or Switter. Hugs and stay safe out there!



The word “dominatrix” conjures up all sorts of images for most of you reading this. Maybe it brings to mind a stereotype of a cold, domineering woman in thigh-high boots, sadistically torturing a helpless male as she laughs at his pleas for mercy. Or maybe you’ve actually seen a domme or two and enjoyed your own bespoke session where you got to safely explore whatever kinks lie deep within your perverted heart. Whatever the terms “dominatrix” or “domme” bring to mind, if you have not yet seen me, then be open to a new image seared into your memory and get ready for a wild ride. As your Mistress, you’ll still have some pretty vivid memories, even if you just see me for straight GFE.


I started off in tantra-based sex work and tantra will always be my foundation. When I started providing prostate stimulation, strapon play, fantasy fulfillment, and domination in my early days, it always had a sensual and compassionate edge. My first blog post was based on a session quote from a sweet masochist, “You inflict pain with such love, Mistress.” I’ve had men try and get me to humiliate or shame them and it was always inauthentic when I tried; my session settings are based in something far from anything mean-spirited and I don’t enjoy activities that border on cruelty (minus therapeutic impact play and some sensual CBT). If I don’t enjoy doing something or mean it, it is pretty obvious. I have strong connections with my men because I genuinely adore seeing those whom I grant the privilege of sessioning with me. I’m a Mistress whose heart is truly in it.

I have always advertised myself a dominatrix in addition to providing escort services and happy endings, but if I had to label myself for non-SEO and advertising purposes, I am more of a service top and a kink expert. Because I am an escort, many “pure” dommes would not consider me a dominatrix or a dominant at all, and in many ways, they are right. Sex can be considered subservient and I aim to please you as much as I use you for my own pleasure. A service top does not fit into the typical BDSM relationship dynamic of dom/sub or top/bottom as we enjoy topping in accordance with our partners’ desires, which is considered a submissive act because, instead of pure dominance, we are fulfilling our partners wants and not just our own. Luckily for me, when I fulfill my partners’ desires, I am bringing myself deep satisfaction and therefore everyone is happy.


I enjoy providing and controlling the experience, but as stated earlier, I only enjoy myself if you enjoy yourself. A sadist is one who has no regard for their partner or bottom. I can border on being a sensual sadist at times, but only if I’m dealing with a masochist who has a raging, dripping hardon the whole time. All these BDSM terms get complicated and if you’re super vanilla and don’t understand half of this, that’s OK. I enjoy vanilla, too and we can have a good time without any bells and whistles, baby! As for being a kink expert, I am highly trained in safety procedures, bloodborne pathogens, anal play, and so much more as you can see from my Kink FAQ. Maybe kink expert sounds too scary for you? Well then, you can call me a sex Goddess, how’s that?

Sex Goddess, vanilla GFE, kinky companion, alternative escort, travel partner in crime, service top, carnivorous dinner date, sensual dominatrix…it’s all a part of what I offer. I am a non-judgmental counterpart in a safe setting who is helping to facilitate unique experiences that we’ll both remember forever and use as masturbation material for years to come. The lucky men who have seen me know the range of delights of which I am capable. Those who have yet to session with me might not know what they are getting themselves into, even after reading my website- specifically my session descriptions and my FAQ.


What can you expect from a non-BDSM session from me? If you request an Amour session then we will have a truly present and intimate connection that is a passionate and steamy romp and probably pretty GFE-esque depending on how intimate you are open to being. I had a gentleman recently say that he was hesitant to meet me because he thought I’d find him boring as he was “vanilla.” This is far from true! Yes, I do post more on my Twitter about kink because it is hard to capture the intimate, sweet, tender moments in a session or adequately describe a mind-blowing orgasm- those are for us and our private memories. If you have specific requests for Greek or other specialties of mine, then it may get a little spicier and bordering PSE, less vanilla, but still not veering into the world of BDSM. I assure you that staying in this realm is a total pleasure for me. Amour sessions can also include light prostate pleasure, working on orgasm control and delay if you are a quick shooter, and navigating erectile dysfunction as I have some tricks up my Agent Provocateur lingerie.

If you request a Kinky Amour session then get ready for your requests to be executed to the letter. It’s times like these that I wish my reviews on TER and Nightshift were still public as they vividly described some of the mischief I got up to before SESTA/FOSTA got them removed from the internet. But, PrivateDelights has some less graphic but still solid reviews of my session style. Some of my favorite kink sessions involve dirty talk, latex fetish, leather love, bondage, sounding, tease and denial, edge play, cock and ball bondage, latex vacuum bed fun, sensory play and deprivation, flogging with soft deerskin to stingy rubber, impact play, spanking bad boys, needle play, foot worship, trampling, nipple stimulation, sensual direction and topping, switching with partners I know and engaging in moderate to heavy PSE, and my most favorite kink session activity being role play.

I adore role play and that is probably one of my strongest offerings. I love to plan in advance and get into character from the first moment. I have an entire room at my incall dedicated to outfits such as office attire from my days as a paralegal (think pencil skirts, button downs, and glasses), nun outfit, nurse uniform complete with the hat and a stethoscope, police uniform, headmistress uniform, school girl outfit complete with plaid skirt, knee socks, and pigtails, club wear, and so much more! I also adore fetish wear requests for things such as OTK boots, latex, leather, stocking and garter worship, and any Agent Provocateur or Bordelle you wish to worship me in. With me, the possibilities are endless for what our session could entail although I do have hard limits, but some of these are flexible with established men i.e. public play or touching my face. Regarding the outfit requests, I have gone so far as to wear a disposable button down so that my inappropriate boss during an intense role play could literally rip my shirt open- it was a fantastic session and I’m still finding buttons all over my private incall!


Start thinking about the possibilities for our time together and let’s make our fantasies come alive. In the end, Mistress Ramona Ryder cannot easily be defined but neither can you. We are all complex, sexual creatures who are evolving and exploring- I just hope we can continue to do it together. So, take my manicured hand in yours and trust me as you’re with a true expert.

Your Mistress,

xx Ramona Ryder


Don't Be a Slave to SESTA/FOSTA



Don’t be a slave to the new rules and regulations online! For those of you who loved The Erotic Review (TER) and used it regularly, I share your pain- TER was the most trusted and established review board in our community. The great thing about TER was the fact that clients could read provider reviews, but providers could also read the reviews clients left; the screening went both ways. Due to this, I got some of my best clients off TER and if a man left inappropriate or derogatory reviews, I steered clear! Additionally, providers were able to white-list clients whom they had seen to flag them as safe to other providers. When we lost TER, we lost yet another safety and screening resource. I have to say that reviewer culture is not necessarily a good thing, as TER is basically Yelp for sex work which can be deemed as degrading, but it was still a great resource for many of us.

Everyone is acting like TER is kaput, but it is actually still active. TER is “unavailable” to those in the USA due to the new laws but there are ways around these new restrictions. If you are using a computer within the United States and want to access TER, you merely have to configure your internet connection to be from a non-US based location or have an anonymous connection. There are two easy ways to do this and I will explain them both.

VPN: A Virtual Private Network, or VPN (see great explanation here), allows users to securely access a private network and share data remotely through public networks. Much like a firewall protects data on a computer, a VPN protects it online and gives users greater anonymity. If you have more questions about what a VPN is and how it works, then please check out this beginner’s guide.

I suggest purchasing a VPN to use on your phone and computer and setting it to a non-US location, such as Switzerland. I use a VPN on my iPhone and my Mac and it has served me well for purposes of using TER. I really use my VPN only when using TER or when using free public Wi-Fi. I could have it on all the time, but if you go on Google, for example, and your VPN is set to France then your results will come up in French and will be marketed toward users located in France. Additionally, when one's VPN is active it can interfere with the usage of things like Netflix. I have been informed by a security expert that NordVPN or TunnelBear VPN is a solid option for PCs and for Macs, ExpressVPN is a good service.

I asked another security specialist about free options for VPN usage and he stated, “There are free VPN services, but they are generally slow and unreliable (or unsafe due to malware). The closest credible guide I could find is here. But in general, if for your clients, I would recommend they pay.”


TOR Browser: Not recommended for use on a work computer as HR can monitor the use of a TOR browser on a work computer. The Onion Router, or TOR browser, was developed so that people could browse the internet anonymously. The TOR network disguises users’ identities by moving their traffic across different TOR servers, and then encrypting that traffic so it cannot be traced back to the user. I found that downloading TOR was similar to downloading Firefox or Google Chrome and, just like those applications, it was free. But unlike those applications, it is a non-profit dedicated to internet security and it is not mining your data. Overall, TOR is just another platform to surf the web, but it just happens to be discreet. When using the internet via the TOR browser, it prevents other parties from monitoring your Internet connection, such as learning what sites you visit, and it prevents the sites you visit from learning your physical location.

Brave is another private browser which has TOR built into to its privacy mode. Brave loads major news sites two to eight times faster than Chrome and Safari on mobile, and nearly two times faster than Chrome on desktop.

For the extra paranoid, you can use a TOR with a VPN.


How to use TER post-SESTA/FOSTA: You’re back online with TER through the use of a VPN or TOR browser, now what? TER as you knew it is a bit different these days. Below are some tips on how to navigate TER now that reviews and profiles of US-based providers are no longer viewable and that the US-based ad boards are inactive.

How to find providers in specific US cities: One can search via the area code of the city where you want to find a provider. Providers have given TER their phone numbers, even if these are not public on their review page, and they will come up in the search. For example, if you are looking for a provider in San Francisco and the Bay Area, you would search the area code “415.” You can figure out the area codes of certain cities are by asking your search engine, “What is the area code for San Francisco?”

Many providers, in an effort to keep their reviews public, have changed their primary location to a non-US location. I frequently tour Japan so my primary location is now Tokyo, even though I am mainly a Bay Area provider. I still come up as San Francisco when searching by area code as I have a 415 number.

On the homepage, you will see “Find Providers” under “Quick Search” and you can just type in the area code in the “Phone” box or you can select “Advanced Search” and type in the area code in the “Area Code” box. I suggest using the “Area Code” box but either way, providers with “415” numbers will appear.

How to find providers by photo and city: The photo board is still active, and providers can post their primary city and the cities that they frequently tour in the title of their photo post. You can find the photo board by selecting “Discussion Boards” and then selecting “Photo Only” under “TER General Boards.”

This whole TER ban in the USA has been a major headache for me. I was not happy when my two main sources of new clients, TER and NightShift, got shut down. I was at the top of my game on both sites and they both got me solid business. Those reviews (especially my TER reviews) helped me get amazing new clients in a secretive world where traditional word of mouth doesn’t really exist.

SESTA/FOSTA has definitely fucked our shit up but we are a crafty community of sexual deviants who will not be suppressed! The world’s oldest profession will continue to exist and adapt as needed. Remember when the phone book became obsolete or when Red Book went down? I don’t but many of you, who have been in the game way longer, most certainly do and you still found me online! Again, on TER I am still listed in the top 100 international providers (currently number 12) and you can find me on the photo board with San Francisco, New York City, Los Angeles, and now Portland as my primary cities. You can also read some of my favorite excerpts from TER and Night Shift reviews on the Praise Page on my website.

To my fellow providers: If you want your reviews to be public again and to come up in area code search results, then please set your primary location overseas. I suggest you also post to the photo board and you can use TinyPic to upload photos. Any provider who gets to see one of my men because of this knowledge that I just dropped is a lucky girl; I abhor scarcity mentality and cattiness. I hope this has helped clients and fellow providers alike- stay safe and naughty out there!

Where there is a will, there is a way.

Your Mistress, 
xx Ramona Ryder


Relevant feedback to this blog as of August 2018: 

One client stated that, "TER has recently made it a little harder as they are now requiring "proof" provider home base is outside US." My work around for this providers is to set your ad location on another ad site to another country and send them that link as verification. After you are verified, switch it back to your US location.

Another client wrote, after logging on with my TER aforementioned tips, “Every provider I looked up in the US was completely blank.  There were no reviews to be seen.  They appeared to all have been taken down and all I got was a note that this person's reviews were no longer on the site.” Yes- if a provider does not change their location to a non-US based location then their reviews will not be visible. Therefore, both providers and hobbyists need to be on board to make this a viable option to continue to use TER as a resource.